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A regular hotel is just a room, and you could just be there because you need a place to sleep.

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Bedroom business.

But that one is all cream and taupe. Sure, it might be sexy in its own romantic way, but for true OTT decadence it has to be the Cardinal Suite. Opulent to the extreme with antique fabric drapes, oil paintings, and a four poster bed, all done up in regal red and gold — hearts will aflutter.

Enjoyed from its enviable position in the Shard, Shangri La boasts views in every direction over our beloved capital. Whether you opt for the most humble room or the plushest of suites, all take advantage of their surroundings with floor-to-ceiling windows, which at night time makes for a sensual experience indeed. The Run-Down: What could be sexier than drinking champagne in a whirlpool bathtub under the night sky?

While the rest of this hotel might be a little business-y, the Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds Suite is all pleasure.

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Incidentally, the outdoor tub seats up to eight. The Run-Down: If your valentine likes contemporary art, this suite might send them into a frenzy. The Beaumont hotel teamed up with prolific British artist Sir Antony Gormley to create an art-meets-hospitality experience like no other. Gormley is best known for his sculptures, and if you book the ROOM suite, you can stay inside one.

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It markets itself as a spa-meets-cinema experience, and indeed its bathroom has a private steam room in which to unwind. Sweet natured couples will love the media hub and its access to a multitude of blockbuster films, while those with less PG-rated tastes can get straight on the unlimited, high speed Wi-Fi.

Interiors are a riot of black glass and leather, oozing Italian masculinity and sex appeal. The bedrooms are like bachelor p, radiating a Wolf of Wall Street style, cigar-smoke-and-braces sexiness.

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The building is an Edwardian town hall full of original art deco features converted into an extremely modern hotel. The Run-Down: Okay, walking along the South Bank can often be the opposite of sexy, pretty awful and hectic actually.

But gazing over it from the luxury of a suite at Mondrian? Much better. When the view has sunk in, you can slink back inside to the king size bed and free standing bath tub.

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The Pennsylvania Suite features a four poster bed, working fireplace, and enormous bathroom. Best of all, you can forget about the stresses of work and focus on businesswithout any of the hassle of a complicated journey.

Aside from all that glorious countryside, a stay at Brimstone offers exceptional spa facilities and personal hosts on hand to pick you up from the train station, bring you breakfast in bed, or light the in-room fireplace. Mezzanine suites are split across two levels; fireplaces and sitting rooms downstairs, and bedrooms and bathrooms upstairs.

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We rest our case. Share Patrick Courtney Patrick has an academic background in Art History, and has worked in fancy fine art sales and luxury brand communications.

And travelling to see art. Instagram: patrickcourtneyldn. Work with us. Share this article.